OMG, That's so Random!

A few weeks ago, I came across Rant, a “language for adding rich variations to text,” written in C#. It uses structured expressions:

html [rep:3][sep:\n]{The <adj> <noun-person>'s <face> betrayed his <adj.ness>}

to generate semi-random output:

text The furry woman's blank face betrayed his profitability. The bored child's grin betrayed his Italian heritage. The veiny teen's sneer betrayed his professionalism.

Neat, right? The thing is, my Mac is a Mono / .NET free zone. Fortunately old Saint Ni—Sven Anders Robbestad ported me a present: Rantjs!

While it isn’t 100% complete yet, Rantjs works quite well. For example, you can use it to generate click-baity Upworthy headlines:

```js

var rjs = require(“rantjs”); var tc = require(‘to-title-case’);

var rant = new rjs.SimpleRant; var r=[ ‘Who Else Wants a ?', 'The Secret of your ', 'Here is a Method That is Helping to ', 'Little Known Ways to your \'s ', 'Get Rid of Once and For All', 'Here\'s a Quick Way to from ', 'Now You Can Have without sacrificing your ', ' like a member of the clan', 'These and their \'s response will make you ' ];

r.map(console.log(tc(rant.rantConstructor)));
``` I recognize that the output below is more madlib than click-bait, but you can improve that by defining your own tags & vocabularies.

```text “Who Else Wants a Mellow Accountant?” “The Secret of Mortally Flattening Your Box” “Here Is a Method that Is Helping Octopi to Lather Ideas” “Little Known Ways to Apprehend Your Boss’s Avocado” “Get Rid of Most All-natural Accountants Once and for All” “Here’s a Quick Way to Prevent Bicycles from Masticating Hungrily” “Now You Can Have Super Flute without Sacrificing Your Smoothness” “Rage Freeze Like a Member of the Estes Clan” “These Boys Snuggled and Their Mother’s Response Will Make You Puke”

```

BTW, Merry Xmas.

Do you even comment bruh?
2017 Neal Shyam